12/07 5 Myths About Your Penis

Tuesday, July 12th, 2011 | View Comments

You may think you know your penis like the palm of your hand, but you probably believe at least one of these myths about it.

By Jud Chandler

Gay or straight, old or young, men are preoccupied with their penises. It’s easy to understand why, since they’re so critical for so many things … okay, two things, but they’re both reallyimportant things. As with anything people are obsessed with, there are lots of myths surrounding penises. Thing is, much like myths about things like hair loss, the common cold, and Justin Bieber, a lot of what’s said is false. (Though we’re pretty sure it’s true that Bieber wears a wig.) So these are 5 myths about your penis.

MYTH #1: Women care more about size than menGuys get, ahem, hung up on penis size because they believe it’s an indicator of masculinity. But they also fear that the size of their junk will make woman laugh … or cry. But here’s the thing: While the British Journal of Urology found that 55 percent of men felt the size of their penis was inadequate, 85 percent of women said their partner’s size was satisfactory. So guys care way more about size than woman. Studies have also shown that women care more about girth than length. Why? Well, the first two or three inches of a vagina contains hundreds of super-sensitive nerve endings. So relax — as long as you’re not micropenised, you’re fine.

MYTH #2: Your boner has no bone in itUh, that’s actually true — there is not, in fact, a bone in your penis. But you can still break the thing like a bone. Allow us to explain! Let’s say your lady is on top during sex; she gets a little too enthusiastic, you slip out of her as she’s bouncing up, and she slams down on top of your penis on the way down. There’s a loud snap, which is the sound of membranes in the shaft tearing, and the blood that normally keeps you hard leaks out to the rest of your shaft. The result is a bruised, swollen, painful, and sickeningly bent penis. If that were to happen — and we shouldn’t have to tell you this — go the hospital immediately. Left untreated, a penile fracture can cause permanent erectile dysfunction, a boomerang-shaped dick, and pain during sex when you do manage to get it up.

MYTH #3: Big feet, big penisThere is no scientific evidence to support that a dude’s junk is in any way connected to the size of his feet. But a 2011 study by South Korean researches found that a man’s fingers (not his hands) may be related to the size of his junk. After measuring 144 flaccid and “stretched” penises, researchers — who that year were shoo-ins for the “Worst Job in Korea” award — concluded that guys who have index and ring fingers that are close to the same size are more likely to have bigger dongs. 

MYTH #4: Erectile dysfunction happens to everyoneImpotence affects more than 18 million dudes in the U.S., so it’s not uncommon … but it doesn’t affect everyone. It’s one thing if you slug too much whiskey and can’t get it up one night — that does happen to pretty much everyone. (Except non-drinkers, but their lives are empty in so many other ways.) It’s full-blown ED if you fail to achieve an erection more than 20 percent of the time. And that can be caused by lots of stuff. In general, your penis is as healthy as the rest of you, so things like a lousy diet, drug abuse, smoking, lack of exercise, and the godd*mned diabetes can leave you limp. But more often than not, the causes are actually just psychological.

MYTH # 5: If you’re uncut, you’re in the minorityYes, there are more circumcised dicks in the U.S. than there are uncircumcised. But worldwide, that’s not at all the case. Circumcision is still widely practiced in religious ceremonies, for cosmetic reasons, and because the World Health Organization says it lowers the risk of HIV infection in heterosexuals by 60 percent. The Center for Disease Control estimated in 2009 that 65 percent of newborns in the U.S. were circumcised. Outside of the country, however, only about 30 percent of males ages 15 have gone under the knife.

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